My favorite current affairs program Today Tonight has done a wonderful job at uncovering the scourge of the Melbourne streets The Hoon!

No I haven’t taken crack cocaine, I’m being sarcastic.

Recently Today Tonight have made a habit of putting on a heart pounding video of a hoon terrorising Melbourne’s streets just before their credits roll. Of course they say how disgustingly terrible it is, but if it is so terrible what the hell are they doing showing it on TV. Showing it on TV just encourages more of the same behavior.

Do you think that hoon was upset they got such a canning on Today Tonight? No, of course not. “SWEET,” the hoon exclaimed just before his loins exploded and his pants filled with a white sticky goo. This is the sort of response that would have been received by the hoon when they saw their video on TT.

It is so expected of TT to be so hypocritical. Do you think their producers are so upset when they receive a video like this? No of course not, they are chasing the revenue received by advertisers. This sort of story ups their ratings by getting revheads to watch TT. They could be a little bit honest by saying, “here is a hoon video decide for yourself if its bad or not”. But no, sadly honesty is beyond channel seven. I would no be surprised if the hoons sent their videos straight to TT.

I just hope the hoon competition started by TT does not result in the deaths of any innocent people. (The lives of the hoons doesn’t matter as much as they know they are risking their lives and by killing themselves they are doing us a service by removing defective DNA from the gene pool.)

I am not one to believe in all this crap, but I just don’t seem to have the motivation to blog. So my new years resolution is to write more and submit some of my short stories to competitions. For my first attempt I am aiming high, The Woman’s Weekly short story competition. For this one I have to write a 3000 to 5000 word short story any genre with a female as the main character. The only problem is that I have never written a short story with a female as a main character. I could take the advice of Jack Nicholson in As good as it gets, “think of a man and take away reason and accountability.” Can do!

Nah, I am too much of a feminist to do that. so i will just write a soppy story about a brave women who lost her entire family in some terrible accident, the terrible accident being the high point of her life. Women who read the Woman’s Weekly love tragic stories it a known fact! But I hate unhappy endings so…. oh. Apparently I am wrong. A friend of mine just noticed that it says on the spine of the Women’s Weekly sitting here, “We want excitement, we want happiness, we want Women’s Weekly.” Ok so then it’s got to be about an insanely happy housewife who roots the gardener and the milkman and the…weekly!

Well anyway I better get writing or it isn’t going to happen.